“The Church Is A Whore (But She Is My Mother)” – Episode #177

There is a pretty startling quote that I’ve heard attributed to Martin Luther, St. Augustine, and others over the years: “The Church is a whore, but she is my mother.”

Whoever said this is not of particular interest. Maybe those more scholarly than me can track it down. But the sentiment of the phrase, is of particular interest.

There are those who would object to this saying on theological grounds, and who would caution us against ever speaking about the Bride of Christ in such terms. After all, the church consists of the redeemed that Christ has purchased with His own blood, whose sins have been washed away, and whose spots have been made white as snow. And this is an exhortation I think we would do well to keep in the back of our minds. It is a great theological truth.

But, then there’s the rest of us who are looking with our own eyes at the reality of the world we exist in. If you’ve lived long enough as a Christian involved in the life of the church, you’ve definitely not only seen some junk, but you’ve probably had direct experience with it yourself. Not only possibly being a perpetrator of misdeeds against others, but being a victim of the same.

Experience can be a great challenge to our theology. Especially when those experiences involve hurt and pain. The book of Job was written to this end.

My experience in the church, particularly in the Pentecostal and Evangelical wings I’ve associated with for the past 20 some odd years, has been very mixed. I’ve seen and experienced some tremendously amazing and good things, but I’ve also seen some terrible.

Among the terrible behaviors: Sexual abuse. People clamoring for power and prestige. Dirty political entanglements. Conspiracy theorists. Nepotism and “all boys club” mentalities. Money hungry preachers. Narcissists. Corrupt leaders. Church splits. Manipulation and control. Fear mongering. Scandals. Hypocrisy. Racism and other types of phobias. Absurd legalisms. Holier than thou mentalities. Lasciviousness. Sunday Christians.

Among the great behaviors: Outstanding acts of love and kindness. People with the hearts of a servant. Deeply sacrificial people who will stop everything they are doing to help you. People who genuinely love Jesus and others. Other worldly people of whom the world is not worthy. Amazing story tellers and communicators. A people that love the poor and marginalized. Humble people who aren’t looking for any recognition.

And the list could go on and on for both sides.

Yet I have a feeling that most of us focus on the negative. Especially in the context of social media. There are a million and one people out there always ready to dump on the church, and tell you what’s wrong with her.

And as someone who has experienced my share of grievances with the church firsthand, I get it. Especially when churches aren’t willing to own up to their sins, to quietly sweep things under the rug, to double down on bad behavior and toxic mindsets, to defend the indefensible, and to perpetuate the very things it should condemn.

Is it no wonder there’s been a massive exodus from organized religion and Christianity in the past few decades? Is it no wonder we have so many people going through what has been labeled, “The Great Deconstruction,” by individuals like Brad Jersak.

People hear the theology and the platitudes, but like Job listening to his friends, that theology doesn’t seem to add up to what they’ve experienced. So, who wants to be part of and identify with a group of people like the church, where there’s this great corporate cognitive dissonance going on? When 2 + 2 doesn’t equal 4, we naturally become suspicious.

And it gets even worse when your suspicions are confirmed– when you discover your mother is a whore. That’s some pretty heavy stuff. She’s a woman engaged in certain behaviors that not only do you not approve of, but that come with a certain reputation around town. People talk about her, and you know of the rumors and whisperings. And worst of all, you know they are true. Very true indeed.

Which of course, breaks your heart, and causes you to feel disillusioned. It makes you have deep conflicting emotions about your mom.

I saw this growing up in a household that took in foster kids. The kids, especially the older ones, really struggled with the fact that their parents were often people of the worst kind. And for those who held onto hope of being reunited with their parents, there was a lot of conflict within them. Yet in spite of all that had transpired in their lives and their parents, they often still had a deep abiding sense of love for their mom and dad.

Which raises me to my ultimate point for today’s podcast. The Church… do you love her? Do you love the church even when she’s a whore?

Yes, sometimes when dysfunction exists of the worst kinds, it might be necessary to draw up some very firm boundaries between people, that keeps them at a distance for a while. So, I get that so many people feel the need to create some distance between themselves and the church, and to no longer darken her doors.

But my question again is, in spite of the church behaving like a whore… Do you still love her? And genuinely so?

I can’t speak for you, but I can speak for me. And all I can say is… I get it.

The church isn’t always this wonderful safe space that’s committed to the thriving of humanity and helping make people more and more like Jesus. Sometimes she shoots herself in the foot and then wants to shoot you in the foot too.

But is there this thing deep within you that says… Yeah, she’s awful, she’s a whore, but I love her anyway?

That’s where I’ve been for a long time myself. I went through a deep crisis of faith before and got burned by the church. And in spite of all the abuse at her hands, all the dysfunction, and all the terrible stuff, I kept longing for her anyway.

I love the church in spite of all the ugly, because ultimately, I feel deep within my heart that Jesus loves her too.

And ultimately, I found myself inexplicably drawn to her yet again. I want her to be the bride that’s been prepared for her groom. A bride that is pure, adorned, and beautiful. And I stick around, tethered to an unshakable dream that Christ holds out for her, and as someone that wants to help make that dream a reality.

The church is a whore, but she is my mother, and I’m going to love her anyway.